Comedians You Should Know release a CD

MARTY DEROSA
Get to know
Hometown Schererville, Indiana
Code name Doc
Secret weapon Sexual crowd work
Fatal weakness 21-year-old girls
Years practicing stand-up four
Need to know DeRosa’s a very likable comedian, whether he’s riffing on Puerto Rican haircuts or glowing vajayjays, he kills.
Wish we didn’t know When DeRosa was younger (like, 29), he would make his dad take him to pro wrestling shows. He’d duck out to the bathroom right after a match so that when the next wrestlers came out, he could walk down the aisle and pretend the crowd was booing or cheering for him.

DANNY KALLAS
Get to know
Hometown Elmwood Park
Code name DK, Piece-of-Shit
Secret weapon Bad breath
Favorite sex move Censored
Years practicing stand-up four and a half
Need to knowThey don’t make ’em like Kallas anymore. His voice, inflection and jokes remind us of Old Chicago (slightly weathered and brutally honest) . “Making out is gross,” says Kallas to a female audience member, “but I will eat the shit out of your box.”
Wish we didn’t know Kallas says he over-analyzes everything. According to him, it took 79 hours to answer our questions.

MIKE LEBOVITZ
Get to know
Hometown Chicago
Favorite color Whiskey
Code name Mike the Flash
Catch phrase “My dick!”
Years practicing stand-up three and a half
Need to knowLebovitz is the chubby, drunken slob (his words) doubling as dad. One minute he’s talking about sniffing coke and dropping a deuce at the gym and the next he’s seguing into seemingly cuddly, but mostly subversive jokes about child rearing. We’re glad he ditched improv for stand-up.
Wish we didn’t knowLebovitz likes to shock people. He’s kissed more straight males on the mouth in public than anyone else he’s ever met.

DREW MICHAEL
Get to know
Hometown Unincorporated Deerfield
Code name Jew Kikel
Weight 163 pounds (The misanthropy adds an additional 10)
Fatal flaw Mortality
Years practicing stand-up His grandma has made him practice at gunpoint since age five.
Need to know Michael’s humor is dark, cerebral, unabashed and often Godless. His take on stalking, for example, hits you with punches that are fast, fearless and fucking hilarious.
Wish we didn’t know Michael says he’s never participated in anything remotely humorous. Everything he does is shrouded in the bleak reality of impending doom.

MICHAEL SANCHEZ
Get to know
Hometown New Castle, Delaware
Code name Chezzy
Height Unknown
Weight Fluctuates seasonally
Years practicing stand-up four
Need to knowSanchez is the resident weirdo. His jokes are brainy and bizarre. For example: “I bumped into this brawny guy and he was like, ‘Watch it motherfucker.’ I said, ‘Come again?’ But in my brain, I was spelling it c-u-m. He had no idea.”
Wish we didn’t know While living in Seattle, Sanchez entered an amateur porn contest. He wrote, directed, edited and starred in his entry. He won first place and walked away with $2,000 and a trip to Las Vegas.

JOE KILGALLON
Get to know
Hometown Chicago
Height 6'1"
Weight 180 pounds of romping, stomping, dynamite!
Years practicing stand-up four
Need to know Kilgallon’s a natural storyteller and doesn’t hesitate to pepper his yarns with chuckleworthy segues and pointed F-bombs. Check out his rant about a madman taking a machete to his taint in rural America.
Wish we didn’t know Kilgallon has twice talked his way out of public urination tickets. He got out of the first one because he’s Irish and the second time he told the officer there was no proof that there was pee on the ground.

The Comedians You Should Know Live Show and CD Release party happens Wed 9.