Colombiana | Film review
Zoe Saldana is hot. This dour revenge thriller is not.
Colombiana has one true asset—the seminude sight of its star, Zoe Saldana—and milks it for everything it’s worth. But as impressive a spectacle as Saldana is running around in short shorts or rappelling down an elevator shaft in her underwear, it’s not enough. The rest of this revenge thriller about a bitter Colombian orphan out to repay the drug cartel that killed her parents is a dreary, anachronistic mess. Olivier Megaton brought an outlandish camp flair to Transporter 3, but his sillier touches here, like a gangster with bloodthirsty pet sharks, feel wildly out of place in an otherwise dour film about a humorless woman. He was a better directorial match with the sardonic Jason Statham, even if Saldana does have a (slightly) better body.