57 ways to amp up your sex life

Get an all-access pass. Get your lady on the couch or a low bed, belly down, with her knees on the floor. Proceed to eat her from behind, letting your hands wander all over her legs, ass, everywhere. The bed gives more support so she can do her own thing, and maybe even use her legs to give you more access. —male reader, Uptown

Delay gratification. Before your sig o goes to work in the morning, give ’em a little lovin’, but don’t let ’em finish. Dollars-to-doughnuts, your sig o won’t be able to keep his/her hands off you when he/she comes home. —RHA

Egg ’em on. The Tenga Egg is a soft, squishy, stretchy, hollow egg with various textures on the inside used as a male masturbatory sleeve ($6 at Early to Bed). Rock it on the head, give a hand job with it or have your partner turn it inside out and rub the soft texture on you. —EP

I TRIED IT !
The novelty of wrapping this odd substance around my husband’s johnson had us intrigued (when fully stretched, the translucent egg looked like an alien pod about to birth the tip of his penis), but my husband says it feels no worse or better than a lubed-up hand. Plus, Tenga is designed for one-time use, so that’s a lot of packaging waste for one roll in the hay—eco-minded horndogs, take note. —female TOC staffer

Bring a new toy into the bedroom. The Cobra ($138 at Early to Bed) is one of the most innovative cock toys on the market, with vibrating sensations directed toward the head of the penis. The Magic Banana ($46 at g Boutique) looks like part of a bright yellow bike lock but when its sides are pressed together, it can be inserted vaginally for a self- or partnered massage. Got a wide-based dildo? Then consider a harness. Check out the SpareParts harness ($88 at Tulip, 3448 N Halsted St, 773-975-1515), which adjusts to fit different-sized people and comes in several colors. —DH

Steal an extra base at Wrigley Field. Nothing beats indulging in a secret orgasm while surrounded by 40,000 fans. Attend a game when the weather is cold; you want to be able to curl up under a big blanket without raising suspicions. Choose seats far enough away from the on-field action to allow you to focus on your own action without the threat of TV cameras or foul balls interfering. Wear clothing that allows easy access for hands slipping inside or underneath. Then let your hands wander under the blanket while you act as normally as possible. Don’t forget to pack hand sanitizer! —female reader, Lakeview