Wanna get laid-back?

NORTHERN CHILL Breathe in tranquility at Door County's Cave Point.

This is what you're thinking: If you're gonna go on a road trip, you are gonna go as far away from the city as your sputtering car will get you. You're going to chill, you're going to relax and, doggone it, you're going to drive 300-plus miles to do it.

For truly secluded R&R, shoot straight to rural northwest Wisconsin, making a pit stop at Madison's Ella's Deli & Ice Cream Parlor (2902 E Washington Ave, Madison; 608-241-5291) for a sugar kick that'll keep you wide-awake for the long ride ahead. Scan the 12-page dessert menu and quickly devour house specialties like grilled pound-cake sundaes, lest the hullabaloo surrounding the toy jugglers, Beatles dioramas, a vintage carousel and children, children, all around ruin your trip of relaxation.

The vast boreal forests, countless rivers and glacial lakes probably make northwest Wisconsin the last place on earth you'd expect to find a boutique hotel that caters to well-heeled couples with cash. But even the French cognoscenti have given props to Canoe Bay (W 16065 Hogback Rd, Chetek; 715-924-4594), the only Midwest property to earn membership in Relais & Chateaux.

If you like Frank Lloyd Wright and forest critters—and we mean really like them—you'll love Canoe Bay, where lodgings run from $325 to $1,800 a night. Built in the '60s by Seventh-Day Adventists as a summer retreat, and converted to a luxury hotel property in the early '90s by a married couple intent on catering to other couples (read: no kids allowed), Canoe Bay comprises two low-slung main buildings (the Inn and Lodge) and a showpiece guest house named Edgewood, designed by a Wright protege, along the shores of Lake Wahdoon, plus a dozen secluded cottages scattered throughout the estate. If you're a smoker, quit now: Lighting up anything is prohibited in these cedar, Prairie-style cabins surrounded by 280 acres of deep forest.

The furnishings and decor are Arts and Crafts, with huge, plush beds, killer A/V setups (ironists can tune in to nature programs on their flat-screens) and lots of beige, chenille and pottery. Cabin fever is out of the question thanks to Jacuzzis, steam showers, Finnish wet/dry saunas, fireplaces and private decks from which you might spy a deer or fox while wolfing down the breakfast of blueberry muffins, oatmeal, coffee and fresh-squeezed OJ quietly left in a basket outside your front door. Dinner is a different animal entirely: $65 prix-fixe regional-cuisine menus by a top toque-for-hire that change daily; wines pulled from a rarefied 10,000-bottle cellar; and jackets required for gents. It's served promptly at 7pm in the Inn's dining room overlooking the lake, and if you find that punctual regimen annoying, you're up shit creek without a paddle, because Canoe Bay runs on well-ordered itineraries.

Henry David Thoreau wanna-bes can linger in the Lodge's library; workout freaks who'd rather jog on a treadmill than hike the miles of trails in the surrounding woods, or canoe across one of the three private lakes, can squirrel themselves away in the building's fitness center. (In-room massages are also available.)

The point here, obviously, is to escape. You're ten miles from the nearest highway, and if a tree falls in the woods, you'll be the only one hearing it. But if you absolutely must seek out the trappings of civilization, tiny Chetek, ten miles to the east, and Rice Lake, 20 miles north, have a few gift and antiques shops, and there are some well-manicured golf courses nearby.

Once complete and utter serenity (and the pricey-but-worth-it dinners) sinks in, ease yourself back into faster-paced life by cutting clear across northern Wisconsin to Door County. Everybody knows about the area's picturesque sunsets, rolling golf courses and sweeping harbors. It sounds fine—until you arrive and find yourself surrounded by swarms of people pouring through kitschy shops in search of the perfect lighthouse painting.

For some well-deserved peace and quiet, leave the bayside resort towns to the tourists for a day and head over to the Lake Michigan side of the peninsula. Just south of Jacksonport, you'll find Cave Point and Whitefish Dunes State Park (3275 Clarks Lake Rd, Sturgeon Bay; 920-823-2400). Watching the waves crash along the steep bluffs of Cave Point, it's easy to forget you're in the Midwest. Kick off your shoes, climb down the rocks and walk along the water until you can't go any farther. Then find your way up to the rugged trail that winds along the lakefront. Climb over (and under) downed trees along the path en route to the state park, where an open beach and the highest dunes in Wisconsin await.

For a relaxing day bayside, schedule some time at The Spa at Sacred Grounds (10450 Townline Rd, Ephraim; 920-854-4733). Putting an emphasis on healing and well-being, the spa offers a wide range of treatments, including hot-stone massage, raindrop therapy, ear candling, Reiki and lymphatic massage. End the day with a double feature at The Skyway drive-in movie theater (Hwy 42 between Fish Creek and Ephraim; 920-854-9938). Call it a night at Evergreen Hill Condos (4006 Hwy 42, Fish Creek; 800-686-6621; www.homesteadsuites.com). The two-story condos feature two bedrooms, two baths, full kitchens, whirlpool tubs, and indoor and outdoor pools. Peak-season rates range from $119 to $209 a night. Best of all, it's located steps from the entrance to the 3,776-acre Peninsula State Park (9462 Shore Road, Fish Creek; 920-868-3258). Finish off the Door County leg of your excursion with a bike ride (rent a bicycle across the street from the park) along the gorgeous wooded trails and six miles of shoreline.

Drive south, and in no time you'll find yourself in Kohler, home to the grandiose Kohler Resort and Spa (see "Artful dodging," page 18), the fancy-schmancy American Club and, most deliciously appropriate, the underground Kohler Waters Spa (Orchard Rd and Highland Dr, Kohler; 800-344-2838). This superb facility offers an array of "water experiences," but for those who simply want a good soak before making the last leg back to Chicago, a day pass ($35) offers access to the waterfall pool.