My colleague Ben remarked this morning on the dumbass title of the new Terminator flick, to which Christian Bale (my boyfriend!) is now attached. The film will be called Terminator Salvation: The Future Begins.
Bad title, but what especially caught my eye was the use of a colon. See, when we were having this conversation, I was working on listing upcoming films for December, and it's colons everywhere (EWWW!).
Alien vs. Predator: Requiem
National Treasure: Book of Secrets
Walk Hard: The Dewey Cox Story
The Water Horse: Legend of the Deep
Sweeney Todd: The Demon Barber of Fleet Street
Now, in the case of National Treasure, we understand that they are differentiating it from the first National Treasure, but don't want to use a number. Ditto with Alien vs. Predator. But what's up with those last three?
I suppose the Walk Hard title is a parody of biography book titles, which always have a colon, but the films this movie mocks (Ray, Walk the Line) don't generally have colon titles. Sweeney Todd is stuck with the colon that got dragged over from the original stage musical (and given that it's a show about a murdering barber and a cannibal piemaker, a lot of colons get dragged…). Water Horse, though, is pretty hard to understand. Was Water Horse not magical enough on its own? Did it need the word "legend" snuck in to signal the fantasy element? And would The Legend of the Water Horse not have worked?
And what about other upcoming titles? Will they be colon-ized (It's alarming how many colon jokes you can work into one blog post!)? Here's a few proposed colon-ized titles. Play along at home!
The Savages: Dad's Dying
Charlie Wilson's War: The Afghan Hound
I Am Legend: A Vampire Hunter's Chronicle
P.S. I Love You: Tears R Us