Heard on the street, Student Guide edition
Funny quotes overheard in Chicago.
We’ve always had tough-guy mayors. Even Jane Byrne was a tough guy.
I like the idea of autocorrect on my phone as a parent that doesn’t want me to swear.
Hyperlocal is the new imported.
I wouldn’t mind work dreams if I got paid in them.
The grim reaper gives me haircuts.
“It smells like a girl I knew in sixth grade.” “It smells like a girl we all knew in sixth grade.”
Do you wanna go back and talk to my 15-year-old self? I sure don’t.
When I’m tired on my way to work, I hope a car hits me so I can lay on a stretcher.
“Everyone thinks this portrait of my father looks like Hitler.” “That looks more like Mike Ditka.”
By 30, you should probably have something you can cook—besides frozen pizza.