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Funny quotes overheard in Chicago.
Do you have something in a binge-drinking-friendly light beer?
My second girlfriend denies we were ever going out, and I think she was right.
It was poppin’ like Orville Redenbacher up in that joint.
I’m famous in some circles. Sex circles.
There’s hemp cream all around us.
You never had kids. Why are you talking to me about parenting?
He’s a grown-ass man with a baby and he asked for a Lava lamp?
The Christmas tree in the bathroom makes me cry.
I ain’t your cow, honey, so why are you trying to milk me?
It looks like something you’d give away at a baby shower.
I only know two Sloanes, and they’re both hot. I also knew a dude named Shayla.