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Funny quotes overheard in Chicago.
I don't realize how fucked up I am until I try to use the phone.
"Damn, this site won't work!" "Which site?" "CowboyLyrics.com."
I was on a Xanax rage because of those bitches, and I was like, "Shut the fuck up!"
He's listening to Puff Daddy on speaker phone.
It would be great if I could go one fucking day without being made to feel like total garbage.
Is it wrong to feel traumatized from seeing him puke? Hashtag barf anxiety.
Your scary neighbor was walking around in a doctor's lab coat.
That blonde surfer guy on TMZ is so fucking hot!
We're really high in a drum circle. My mom's band is playing later.
I need a pic with you in it, preferably smiling, otherwise you weren't there.